Boy, once i'm alone, it gets worst.
So much i've seen, but i dont know which is worst.
All i know, is that it cuts real deep.
I want to know what you're thinking, what you really want.
People say, fight for what you want.
I've fought, but i find myself bloody and half dead.
Is it worth it, i ask?
I feel like im losing my dignity bit by bit when i ask of you to hold on.
I hide away my pride and pretend that its alright.
But truth is, half the time, i'm dying inside.
All i want to do, is to keep fighting.
But im getting tired. Real tired.
I dont want to keep fighting against you, i wanna fight with you.
Can you see that?
Deep down inside, i tell myself to take it all in. People aint perfect, so are you.
But its not a crime to want to be treated better, or maybe just a little more than you treat those around you.
I keep reminiscing the times where you would leave stuff outside my house just to cheer me up or encourage me for my exams.
Yeah, you still do that, but not for me, for someone else, i know.
So many things i know, but i dont say.
Because by saying it, i have to face it. I dont want to be sad, i dont wanna see the truth.
You promised her the sky, and vowed to catch it for her if it falls.
I saw that in your words, heard it in your tone.
As much as i would like to believe it, i cant see beyond whats in my face.
As much as you wished for her, did you ever do the same for me?
If being your friend deserves this much of your love and attention, being your girlfriend doesn't?
I thought i deserved better.
Seriously, i do.
While im fucking sad here, no posts, no song lyrics, no "i miss you", no nothing.
Im asking myself if i deserve this and i wanna ask you the same question too.
Why does she get so much from you, and all i get from you is possibly nothing?
Even though you knew what she said about me, you did nothing. NOTHING. But you kick up such a big shit, when you think i said what i didn't. The whole time, you were on her side, unknowingly. You blatantly asked me not to insult her, but did you do the same for her?
Aiya, shit lah. I dont wanna repeat myself.
You think its worth it, for your own girlfriend, to be shedding tears and whatnot on your precious friend?But on her side, you protected her so well, telling her you'll stand by her and all that. But to me, it was harsh words, and whatever that you said before. You said girlfriend and friends are on different wavelines, but incidentally you connected both and got us into this deep shit.
Whats worst is that you tried to hide. Hide everything from me, while telling another party, that she knows you best.
Not your girlfriend.
Not me.
I guess you dont understand how that feels right. Cos that explains why you leave me here, and assuming im alright.
I dont understand why other bfs try their best to cheer their gfs up, while i have to be left alone here.
Like you try to cheer her up. But i dont get a shit.
I dont get a shit.
I seriously hope you will reflect? Okay, i feeel better saying everything out. I dont wanna say anything about this matter anymore. Case closed.
